February 24

Today I went to the wake of Liz's Grandpa and I don't know if this is too controversial for the internet, but it was the first time I've ever seen a dead person. It's true. I've been to one wake before and the casket was closed. He looked just like any other sleeping person except he wasn't breathing. I couldn't really wrap my mind around it. It's weird, I can't identify with the concept of death. It's the one thing in my life that is unequivocally definite and yet I can't even begin to imagine it happening to me. I'm having one of those rare moments where I feel the need to drink water, and then I drink it. It's called thirst, and it doesn't happen a lot. 

I really loved this phrase from Beloved: "Spirit willing; flesh week." It's from the Bible. I like this book so much; I want everyone to read it. Also I love Mr. Tarmey. Today he told us we were the quietest AP class he's ever had and asked, "Is it me?" Of course it's not him, I don't really know why people don't volunteer their opinions more, because there certainly are opinions. Sometimes it hits me: aren't I so lucky to be able to take this class for free, every day? When else is someone going to give me a free book and help me understand it and want to talk about it for a whole hour? School. The song of the day is "Calender Girl" by Stars.

Liz is brave and so is her family. Death is rough.