Wednesday

June 3


My internet just broke but I waited up for it to fix itself just so I could blog. Because there are many dependent readers who read this between the hours of one thirty and nine thirty, there is no one. While I waited, I ate a pudding. Now I regret this. I wasn't even hungry and I don't like pudding. I used to, but once my mom bought a ton of pudding in a short span of time and too much of a good thing makes for not liking pudding.

I am in a state of melancholy resulting from lack of brain stimulation. I guess this is summer? I'm bored. I'm bored of the routine I have every day: wake up late, walk around in pajamas, eventually get dressed, hang out with friends, have a little fun but not that much, come home late at night, facebook chat, blog, go upstairs and fumble around in the dark, go to sleep, do it all over again. The worst part is, when I start working, my official summer will start, and that will probably be even more boring. Little by little I am getting excited for college. I think it was the roommate search that did it. Because I found one cool person at UMass, I blindly think UMass will be chock full of cool people. There is a psych term for what I am describing here. 

Today I played in orchestra for the last time ever. I guess I should say a little about orchestra. Well, I was probably one of the worst players, but I would much rather be the dud in group of fantastically talented individuals than be the star in a group of duds. That's why I was always in the highest level math even though I secretly couldn't handle it. Actually, that's probably why I didn't want to go to UMass for so long. I just wanted to go somewhere where I could be the worst. It sounds pretty twisted when I say it like that. I will miss orchestra. I always liked going to rehearsals, even though I didn't really have any friends and I usually got bad parts. I would just sit quietly and enjoy myself thoroughly. I am good at sitting quietly. I am not afraid to be in a situation where I don't know anyone or can't make any friends. I just bring a book and reflect quietly, or watch the people around me. Sometimes I judge them and it's entertaining. But I don't like being alone for an extended period of time. 

I said "I" too many times in this post. The song of the day is "Lisztomania" by Phoenix, because it's catchy and summer-y. Is he saying rhino? I can't tell. Oh no. I had something important to do tomorrow and it just slipped my mind completely. 

The picture of the day is what is directly to my right. You may say it's un-creative, but really, it's about time this scene shows up on this blog. It really captures what I am doing every night at this time. I'm glad my grandmother and cousin are staying here but when they leave, I am going to be so happy to have my own bed back. I am sleeping on the futon on the floor of Emily's room and every morning she gets up at six and I wake up when she steps on my bed and blow-dries her hair directly above my ear. Two days ago she woke up and said "Shit." It was six forty six. Then she got up and got ready and at seven sixteen I heard her yell, "Daddy I'm ready."

2 comments:

Stephen Cary said...

The term you're thinking of is "illusory correlation", I think.

J. Frixj said...

Steve, that term refers to expectation shaping one's analysis of a complete set of data, thereby coming to a false conclusion. Phoebe's talking about coming to a false conclusion based on insufficient sample size. From her data, she can accurately conclude that the SAMPLE is chock full of cool people, but her use of the sample to represent the population is misleading. There is a term for this, and I would love to supply it, but a year of AP Psych and a semester of psych stats seem to have more or less vacated the premises of my brain. This is because they were boring as all get-out.